Training Date -- PG-13

[Wind Fish]

I finally finished it. Overall I think it turned out alright, as odd as this whole thing is. Far from perfect mind you, but I think it's the best I can do right now.

This is a sequel to "Another Night's Work", though you don't really have to read or remember that to understand this. The only real tie to that story is a mention of a plot I felt I left slightly unresolved. I also reference something from "Cheater", but that's not important either.

This was supposed to be Connor and Salome's first date. You know, a social engagement between two persons that often has romantic character. Don't ask me how this *points to story* happened instead. All I can say is that it's based on a dream. No, still don't ask.

Previously all my stories have been linear. This one is not. Please let me know if I just made it confusing. I'm sure there are better ways of keeping people in suspense and avoiding being redundant.


Summary: Connor's plans for spending the day with Salome take an unexpected turn. Like the prequel, this takes place in between Still Life and The Vampire Slayer. Not that any of the following would ever happen or anything.

Characters: The Fab Five

Words: A little over 3000

Rating: PG-13 for... not a whole lot. Mainly just because of an allusion to a violent event from the prequel. Mild language and violence otherwise, I guess.

Special Offer: All character's names spelled correctly or your money back.

[Wind Fish]

It was four in the afternoon. Connor had hoped by this time he and Salome would be well into their first date. Connor wanted to take his girlfriend to the Viewpoints Gallery, an attempt to show genuine interest in one of Salome's hobbies this time, and possibly to Kirk's Steakburgers afterwards. He was in the mood for something other than a Doublemeat Medley today. Instead they were essentially doing what they did almost every day: hunting their enemies. There were a few differences, however.

"So, Ace, are you finally going to explain to me how we ended up in the woods carrying rifles?" Salome didn't think that was a question she'd have to ask when she awoke this morning.

"Yeah, sorry. I couldn't say anything in front of the others since they thought you already knew. I guess I should start from the top, huh?"

"Yes, because I'm very confused. This whole day has been nuts and I don't know how why."

As they walked side by side, Connor started to recall the day's events.


****


Connor was just about ready to leave the apartment when Andrew emerged from his room after ending a phone conversation.

"Was that Council?" Connor asked.

"Yes. Giles will contact a therapist who specializes in helping those who have unexpectedly come across the demon world. She should be able to help Ms. Thurman cope with what happened last night." Diana Thurman was the name of the woman who used a .44 Magnum to blow the head off a vampire.

"Good. That's good." Connor glanced at the clock that read 11:03 AM. "I'm running late. I better get going."

"Going? I thought we could train today since you don't have class."

Connor was sure he had already told Andrew that he had plans, but at the moment he couldn't remember saying anything. He was faced with a dilemma. Connor didn't want Andrew to know about his and Salome's relationship change, though he was sure the truth about where he was off to wouldn't reveal anything. On the other hand, he hadn't trained in a few days and he felt the need to show Andrew that he wasn't skipping out on his responsibilities, if only so he didn't have to hear a lecture. "Actually, Salome and I decided to train together today. With things getting rougher out there we decided we should work on our teamwork a little."

"Oh, that's a great idea! I haven't seen the two of you fight together in a while. I need to evaluate how well you work with others."

Connor realized he hadn't thought that lie through very well. Now he'd have to think of a way to discourage Andrew from coming along, but his mind was drawing a blank. Finally, the answer came to him. "Well, it isn't exactly conventional training. We're, uh, playing paintball."

"Paintball?" Andrew wasn't sure he heard that part correctly.

"Yeah, because, you know, it'll help us practice being stealthy. And we'll be playing against people who will be working as one unit against us, which I think will be more of a challenge than a couple inexperienced vampires. Plus, you've said that I need to use long ranged weaponry more often." Connor hoped at least some of that made sense.

Andrew considered that for a moment. "I don't think the Slayer Handbook mentions paintball."

"It was probably written before paintball was invented." Connor needed to get back to the task at hand. "The point I'm getting at is that I don't think you really need to evaluate this. If I'm clean, I did well. If I look like Salome's dorm room after she's done painting, I need more work. Besides, the projectiles would be coming at you too. I can't picture you wanting to be apart of that."

"I don't know," Andrew sounded a little hurt by the thought of being excluded, "I could use the field work too." Andrew started to perk up a little as a thought came to him. "And a paintball game would be a perfect chance to teach enemy engagement strategy."

"Well..." Connor could swear he saw his chance of being alone with Salome falling through one of the many cracks in the apartment floor.

Andrew's mood only elevated at that clear sign of Connor wavering. He brightened again as another revelation came. "Oh! Those paintball guns, they usually resemble Star Wars blasters, don't they?"

Connor thought about that and could see the comparison. He wondered if the head gear they'd have to wear looked anything like a Storm Trooper helmet.


****


"Okay, I do not look like a Storm Trooper," Salome whined through goggles that actually covered her whole face. "And you're going off track."

"Sorry, you're right. You look more like our exterminator," Connor said with a grin.

Salome pointed her gun at her boyfriend's chest.

"Moving on then." That really was a bad joke, he thought. "Andrew seemed too excited so I just decided to go along with my great alibi, hoping like hell you'd go for it."

"That explains your idea of how to woo a girl, and the third wheel. I'm not seeing where the fourth comes in."

"I'm almost there. So just as Andrew and I were leaving..."


****


Connor and Andrew stepped outside their building just as Jamie walked up the block. "You're back early, Jay. What's up?"

"I couldn't concentrate. The library was too quiet. I've gotten used to hearing our apartment falling apart around us," Jamie said with a frown. "You two off to do the Watcher-Slayer thing?"

"Yes. Er, kind of," Andrew replied. "We're playing paintball!"

"Well I guess I'll... huh?"

"I..." Connor glanced at Andrew briefly before turning back to Jamie, "Salome and I... it's an alternative to the normal training routine." Connor let out a quiet sigh.

Jamie turned to Andrew with amusement. "You're playing too, Andy?"

Andrew nodded. "Isn't it a great idea? It's a perfect simulation of armed combat. Our very own Danger Room, if you will."

There was suddenly a glint in Jamie's eye. "Hey, you guys don't mind if I tag along, do you? I think I could use a break."

"You want to come too?" Connor decided he wouldn't mind Jamie's company if he couldn't shake Andrew, but he decided to try once more to lose both of them. "You guys do realize that those paintballs can really hurt if they hit you in the wrong spot, right?"

"Riley, I play hockey. I'm not worried about a little contact." Jamie pointed to Andrew. "And I'm sure he's more than able. He's gone up against much worse than paint."

Andrew looked less confident but responded with a positive nod. "Of course." He turned to Connor. "And you won't let anything happen to us." It was a statement, but there was a little nervousness in the tone.

"Well, I can't..." Connor started.

Jamie interrupted, "No, he won't. I'll be right down, just let me drop these books off inside." Without another word he ran into the apartment building.


****

[Wind Fish]

"I think Jamie knew what he was doing from the beginning," Connor said, finishing another part of his tale as he and Salome continued their trek.

"The kid has a real mean streak to him, doesn't he?" Salome decided now would be a good time to change the subject. "I think I get the picture now, and even though this has been an interesting day, you're still going to have to find a way to make it up to me." The last part came out in a sexy purr.

"Wait, I didn't tell you why Oni went with us." Connor protested.

Salome stopped dead in her tracks. "I'm disappointed in you, Ace. There I go, giving you the perfect opportunity to partake in a little sexual innuendo and you completely fail." Salome sighed. "And did you forget? I was there. I know why Oni came with."

"Oh yeah. Sorry."

Salome laughed at the memory of Connor telling her 'their' plans for the day. "You're just lucky I didn't expose you for the fraud you are."


****

Hearing a knock on her dorm room door, Salome opened it. She was happy to see Connor on the other side of the threshold. The presence Andrew and Jamie standing behind him was another story.

"Sorry I'm late, Sal. Are you ready to go?" Connor purposely ignored Salome's puzzled look in order to gain a few extra seconds of preparation for his explanation. He wondered why he didn't ask the other two to wait outside the building. His lack of a working brain today was making things more difficult than they had to be.

"Yes, I am... but I was under the impression that we were going alone."

"Andrew and Jamie decided that our, uh, idea of..." Connor swallowed nervously, "paintball as a substitute for training was a good one." Connor gave Salome a look that he hoped said 'please for the love of god pretend to know what I'm talking about.'

"I see." Salome wondered where the closest rehab center was because her boyfriend had to be on crack.

"You're okay with that, right?" Connor's eyes were still pleading for a positive answer.

Salome recalled last night's conversation in which Connor expressed a desire to do something normal. Considering their respective lives, she was sure this fit their definition of 'normal' fairly well. "You know, I think it'll be fun." She decided to see just how well Connor had planned, well, whatever it was he was doing. "Have you decided what park we're going to?"

Connor started to open his mouth, then paused when he realized that that was a pretty good question. He wasn't exactly an avid paintball player, after all. "Um... I was kind of hoping..."

"Fairgrounds Paintball Park is within a sufficient distance from here." Oni supplied as she continued to read a book.

"Oh, hey Oni. Sorry, I didn't notice you there."

Oni looked up. "Hello Connor. James. Mr. Wells." The other boys waved and nodded, respectively, in greeting. They all stepped into the room as Salome gave way. "You never told me you were interested in paintball, Salome."

"I didn't know I had an interest in it until very recently." Salome winked at Connor, then turned her attention back to Oni. "How do you know about the paintball park?" Her face scrunched up. "You haven't played before, have you?"

"Heavens no!" Oni scowled at the thought. "My friend Basho lives in San Jose, near the park."

"Basho?" Salome scanned her mind for a list of Oni's acquaintances and came up blank.

Oni nodded. "A Ganklar demon. His birth name is Larry, but we call him Basho because he speaks only in haiku." Oni rolled her eyes when the blank looks told her that no one got the reference. "Basho Matsuo? The poet who popularized the haiku?"

"Only in haiku? Really?" Connor tried to picture that, but couldn't.

"Sometimes he fails to provide an expression of sensation, but he does speak in a five-seven-five syllable structure. He is very entertaining, and insightful. Oh! Are you four heading to the Fairgrounds then? You should stop by his mansion after you are finished pretending to do violence. Ganklars love company. I would join you, of course, if it isn't a bother. Though I think I will go straight to Basho's since I have no need to watch you shower each other with bright colors."

Everyone looked at each other not knowing what they should say.


****


"I wonder if he'll get annoyed if I constantly ask him 'yes or no' questions," Salome mused about the impending visit with the 'Haiku' demon.

"I'm just trying to picture how he curses after stubbing a toe. If he even has toes." Connor shook his head, then looked behind him. "Should we still be out here, Sal?"

"They're fine, Ace. It hasn't been that long. Andy wanted us to continue and James... he probably could use the time to clear his head a little."

"I know he had to take his frustrations out on someone, but if it had to be one of us, I wish it would have been me."

[Wind Fish]

****


The referees explained that it would be up to their discretion if a player suffered a fatal shot. It was also explained that while the refs would not be noticed, they would be in fact watching all the action. Connor inwardly laughed at that thinking that there's no way anyone would be able to hide from him.

After getting fitted for gear and weapons, the four headed off and the game had officially begun. Andrew decided that this was as good time as any to start his lesson. "The first rule to a stealth mission is that..."

There was a gunshot and Andrew felt something impact his back. "Ow! I'm hit!"

Connor and Salome whirled around to seeing Jamie pointing his rifle straight at Andrew. "Jay?"

Andrew turned around at that and took three shots to the chest, the final of which knocked him down, before Connor was able to restrain his friend. "What the hell are you doing?"

"It's just payback."

Salome helped Andrew up. "You okay, Andy?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." Andrew sounded small as he stared at the ground.

"Payback? For what?" Connor couldn't figure this out.

"Andrew, next time tell me when you're going to touch my things, okay?"

"I'm... I'm sorry about breaking your property, Jamie. I'll do my best to replace it." Andrew never looked up.

"Wait," Connor was really puzzled now, "this is over a broken controller?"

"And he cracked the goalie mask autographed by Mike Richter." Jamie added.

"You what?" Connor addressed that to Andrew, then realized that didn't matter so he directed his attention back to Jamie. "That's still no excuse to..."

"Whatever, man. I'm hungry. I'm heading to that Taco Bell down the road." Jamie just turned and headed back to the entrance.

Neither Connor or Salome was sure what to do. Connor decided he should let Jamie go for now and work on Andrew. "I'm sorry. I didn't know..."

"I should have been more careful with his things."

"No. I mean, yeah, but still." Connor sighed. "I don't think he's really mad at you. It's just... with everything that's happened to him... he was bound to snap at something."

A referee walked up to the group. "I hate to interrupt, but I have to remind you that friendly fire counts. You're out of the game."

"Oh, okay." A disappointed Andrew handed his weapon to the ref, who walked away.

"Do you want us to quit the game, Andrew?" Salome sincerely asked.

"No. You two wanted to come out here for practice. You should do that."

Connor almost came clean, but he realized doing so just might make his Watcher feel worse. "Okay, if you want us to."

Andrew nodded slightly and started to stalk off, but Connor stopped him. "Wait. Here, take my wallet. Use whatever you want on the arcades back at the entrance." Andrew took it. "And Andrew? I know it's hard, but please try not to take the outburst personally. It wasn't directed at you, really."


****


"I feel bad for both of them. Andrew for today. Jamie for... everything up to this point." Connor summed up his feelings about the current events.

"He's going to have to deal sooner or later. This is his life now, whether he wants to admit it or not."

"I know, but we have to..." Connor's thought was interrupted by gunfire from all sides. Having long ago forgotten that there were people after them as well, Connor and Salome were in no position to stop the onslaught that hit them. After a few long seconds it ended.

There were horns sounding that announced the end of the game.

"Ugh, I think I know how my canvas feels."

Connor looked blankly at the scenery around him. "What the...? Did we just lose?" he asked incredulously.

A referee appeared in front of the couple. Connor had no idea where he came from and he boggled at how out of sorts he had been today. He needed a vacation. Not that that was an option right now, or ever again.

"I'm afraid so," the ref replied, unnecessarily answering Connor's spoken question. "I'll need to take your weapons now."

Connor and Salome handed them over. As the ref walked away, the other team gathered around each other a short distance away. A few stray comments about their 'pathetic' opponents could be heard mixed in with the celebration.

"Oh, I don't believe this." Connor was just about ready to lose it as they both removed their goggles.

"Let them have their fun. We know we could take 'em if we really wanted."

Connor wasn't listening; it was time for him to vent. "This day has been a total disaster! I try to get out of training by telling my Watcher I'm training, I ruin my plans to take you somewhere nice, my friends are shooting each other, then of course we get shot, and... and... how the hell can someone only speak in haiku?!"

Salome didn't know how to answer that so she grabbed Connor and kissed him instead.

After a few seconds they broke apart. Connor took a moment to reorient himself. "Well, okay, maybe not a total disaster." Part of Connor wished they could stay put for a while, but he really needed to check on his friends. "We should be getting back to do damage control."

"Yeah, I know. Let's go"


****


Andrew was currently playing the Iowa course of the arcade game Crusin' USA.

"Are you trying to hit all the cows?"

Startled by the familiar female voice, Andrew swerved his car into on coming traffic. The resulting crash caused him to miss his checkpoint. "Thanks a lot, Salome!" He looked behind him, seeing Connor and Salome out of their gear but still covered in paint of various colors. "What happened?"

Connor shrugged. "We lost." He looked around nervously. "Did Jamie come back?"

"Yeah. He apologized, gave me a gordita, and then we played Air Hockey. I think he let me win."

"I don't know about that." Connor smiled. "Even considering the circumstances, I don't think he'd let anyone beat him in anything." Connor went back to being concerned. "Where is he now?"

"He went of to see Oni's friend, saying something about wanting extra time to steal some material in case he needed it at some point for a creative writing class. Don't worry, he made another copy of the address for us."

"I think it'd be a good time to for us to head there ourselves. Are you done here?"

"I'm ready."

Andrew gave Connor his wallet back. He put it away without checking to see how much money was gone. Not that there was a whole lot left in the first place. This day had been more expensive then he had initially planned.

As the three made their way out, a thought came to Andrew. "Ganklar's are peaceful so please do your best to avoid killing Larry."

Connor and Salome looked at each other with raised eyebrows and shrugged. Connor replied, "We'll do our best, Andrew."

After a simple nod, Andrew looked at each of their paint stained clothes. "We have a lot of work to do. All of us dying is unacceptable."

On that, everyone could agree.

[Emcee]

This was absolutely, 100% hilarious! Poor Connor. That poor guy just can't get a break.

My favourite line was "This day has been a total disaster! I try to get out of training by telling my Watcher I'm training, I ruin my plans to take you somewhere nice, my friends are shooting each other, then of course we get shot, and... and... how the hell can someone only speak in haiku?!"

I can really see this actually happening. Andrew WOULD interrupt Connor and Salome's first date.

And the paint ball thing inspired a (non-TNP canonical) Connor/Salome story from me. I'm still working on it.

It's... Uh... Well... Let me put it this way, if I actually post it, Connor will be having a lot better time than he did in this one.

[Wind Fish]

Cool. I'm glad you like it. I was very worried the whole thing was too ridiculous. I'm told I have a weird sense of humor, you may have seen it here already, and I couldn't tell if this was something only I'd like or not.

And that was my favorite line too. I couldn't stop laughing as I was typing it.

And the paint ball thing inspired a (non-TNP canonical) Connor/Salome story from me. I'm still working on it.

It's... Uh... Well... Let me put it this way, if I actually post it, Connor will be having a lot better time than he did in this one.

Okay, I have to speak up now. My inspirational dream? I was watching an episode of TNP and Connor told Andrew he was going to play paintball with Salome, but he had a smirk on his face like he meant it in an NC-17 way. Apparently my dream-self wasn't interested in finding out if that was true because I changed the channel at that point. But I couldn't get the paintball part out of my head after the dream. It's been in my head since even before I did the prequel to this.

The point is, if you do finish your story, you at least have to show it to me. I'll be in your debt forever if you do.

[Emcee]

Weird sense of humour is a good thing. I very much appreciate people with a weird sense of humour.

You got it totally right. Connor would bitch about it and Salome would just grab him and kiss him to shut him up. She would also roll her eyes a bit. I think Salome is happy doing just about anything with Connor.

I was watching an episode of TNP and Connor told Andrew he was going to play paintball with Salome, but he had a smirk on his face like he meant it in an NC-17 way. Apparently my dream-self wasn't interested in finding out if that was true because I changed the channel at that point. But I couldn't get the paintball part out of my head after the dream.

Hah! I'd be totally mad at my dream self personally. But then I'm a totally perv.

I probably will finish it and post it here in the forum. Here's a teaser:

"My painting!" Salome gasped.

Connor whirled her around. He claimed her mouth possessively. "I told you... The paint looked better on you."

[Buffy8Fan]

There was parts to this that I loved and parts to this that I hated. I hate Xander Harris and have hated him ever since he said the phrase, "Yeah well she's dead!" to Giles in Becoming Part One and I cheered when he got his eye gouged out (there have been literally a handful of times I can say with confidence that I like him).
I felt bad for Jamie when Jules died and still do in some of this fanfiction, but when a Nintendo controller is what sets him off thus making Andrew feel even more out of place than he already does (I am like Andrew when it comes to trying to fgit in and not being able to), the only thing I felt for Jamie at that point is what I feel for Xander 95-99% of Buffy, and that is contempt and hatred.
As for Connor ans Salome, I don't think there date was ruined. It just got turned into a group date. With one of the group members not knowing they are going out. After all there was a kiss at the end and everything.

[Wind Fish]

You know, I almost cut the whole plot with Jamie out (or changed it, at any rate) because I wasn't sure it fit with the tone of the rest of the story. But I left it in for a few reasons.

1. I wanted Connor and Salome alone together and I couldn't think of another way to get the other two out of there.

2. Jamie's outburst gave Connor another reason to be frustrated with how things were going.

3. I felt like exploring Jamie's mind set, even just a little bit.

As for his reasons for snapping, well, a lot of times when people are under a lot of stress it's the little things that push them over the edge. That's what I was going for here. So I hope it at least made some sense.

With that said, I understand being angry with Jamie over this. Geez, I actually felt bad for Andrew there. You know I can't be happy with someone whose actions lead me to feeling empathy for Andrew. It calls my whole existence into question.

I just hope it didn't ruin the rest of the story for you.

And I agree, I don't think the date, overall, was ruined either. In fact, I think Connor's viewpoint of the whole thing will have changed by the end of the day, if it hadn't already.

[Emcee]

I actually understand Jamie acting so immaturely. I mean, there's all of this crap happening in his life that he CAN'T do anything about. Andrew breaking his controller is something he can do something about. And I think he redeemed himself by getting Andrew a gordita.

I don't think Jamie was being particularly malicious. He was just being a guy. (You boys can correct me on this) but that's what boys do. They act like jerks together, but they're still friends. Jamie, Andrew and Connor are buddies. This will become even more obvious after 1x13. I think they've got similar mindsets and they are just friends. Maybe they're not always nice, but that's the way it goes.

I think Connor did have fun, it's just not what he had planned. I've always thought that Connor is a romantic, so playing paintball on his date isn't really high on his list. While in a normal situation, he would REALLY enjoy it, he was looking forward to just being a boyfriend.

[Wind Fish]

That was a good way to put all that.

And yeah, boys do things like that from time to time in my experience. Friends might throw down for some reason and then ten minutes later be hanging out like nothing happened.

But one key point here is that Andrew is the newcomer into the group. Sometimes when you're the new guy it's hard to feel like you're fitting in and any sign that you're not can be a little demoralizing, even if that isn't the intent of another's actions. In that sense Jamie targeting Andrew was worse than if he had done a similar thing to Connor.

["Beat me in hockey will you, Riley? Eat paint!" (Aw man, I should have done that! I guess that would have changed the whole story though. Director's cut, perhaps?)]

I did want to show that Jamie did his best to smooth things over afterwards. And if the reader decides to believe that this story actually happened, since we don't see any ill feelings in episode 9 I'm thinking they both got over it.

Looking back, I don't know why I didn't have Jamie there in the last scene. That probably would have been a better way to show that they're still cool with each other.

(I swear, whether I want to or not, the next time I feel like writing if I don't have another idea this whole thing is going to be rewritten. Or even worse, I'll make it episode length and turn it into Groundhog Day or something, probably from Jamie's POV if he's going to be making different decisions. Man, I just thought of a villian who could be behind it all. I need to hurry up and post this so I stop thinking about things.)

(EDIT: And then in the time it took to edit a glaring mistake, I thought of another possible plot point. Dammit!)

[Wind Fish]

After mulling things over while not high on lack of sleep, I do have a possible Jamie centric idea I might do. I just needed to separate it from this story. One problem is that it might be much longer than anything I've done up until now and that intimidates me. The other problem is my fear that in the long run it'll fuck with canon, which I'm still too anal about.

With that, now we take you back to your regularly scheduled programming.